Tuesday, May 27, 2008

I Said I Never Would

......I did something yesterday that I said I would never do.......... I have thought about it several years but I just did not feel the need....... I do not know what caused me to choose this year but I did........ I thought that I would have some emotional feeling going there but I did not ......... I was quite at easy and found that I was glad that I had come........... The flowers so needed attention and I came prepared with some pretty flowers from my stash......... I always have a stash................ You see....... I had not been to the place where we laid my grandmother since that day in 1996. When we put her there I was so broken hearted as I loved my grandmother so... I grieved for weeks and weeks and I miss her still today......... She was my mentor and my life coach. She taught me so much about life and she just loved me......... You just knew that she loved you..........

....... She taught me to cook and to sew and she is the reason that I love to dig in the dirt........... She was always in the garden growing something ......

..........She was a simple woman if terms of things and money........ but she was a woman rich in wisdom and life skills........ She was never critical and never judgemental..........through all my trouble in life she always had a good word to say and always encouraged me to trust in the Lord and He would guide my life........... She was a strong woman of faith and the foundation that she laid for me remains to this day.......

......... She was 99 when she went to be with the Lord just 8 months short of her 100th birthday...
......... I have not been back to the place where we laid her since that day in 1996 ...... but something took me there yesterday............... I thought that it would affect me more than it did..... I stood for a minute over the marker and then sat and put a few yellow flowers in her metal vase............ You see...... I so miss Ida Potts but she is not there....... she has never been there...... When she left that day she was immediately went to be with the Father....... We only laid her body there to be raised at the sound of the trumpet........... Soooooooo today I stood over a place where we laid her body................. but

This is how I remember her............. and this is who I will see again when the trumpet sounds...
and.......... I so enjoyed giving her some pretty flowers.......... I will go back often..........
Memorial Day ......... a day to remember those that have gone before......... We all have loved ones to remember........... and we all have loved ones that we will be united with one day...
hugs



10 comments:

Sandra said...

I have never been back either, but I talk to her often.
That is one of my favorite photos of her.
She was so full of wisdom.
I always loved going to her house for the weekend and helping her get ready for Sunday morning church. She would let me fix her hair and put makeup on her.
Once, I wrote a poem for her but was too embarrassed to read it to her. She was convinced it was for a boy at school.

Sharon Brumfield said...

I have never been back to my grandparents graves either. Probably because like you...I know they are not there.
I am glad that God has healed your heart so that you can be able to visit without pain.
We have gone and taken care of Paw Paw grave site...but he is not there..he is walking gold streets.
What a glorious day it will be for us all when the graves open at our Saviors return.
What sweet memories you have of your grandmother.She would be proud of the woman you have become I am sure.

MYSTI said...

Strange, but i felt the same way when my mom passed. It was a year after your grandmothers passing. I did go back last time i was home, but it is not a place i wanted to ever go back to. My mom I know i will see one day again...

Hugs to you, and btw your grandmother was one beautiful lady.

hugs and blessings

Sandra said...

The poem was a simple one. I think I was in the sixth grade when I wrote it.

"The beauty of a rose is quite deceiving
For it is of my believing
That it shall wilt and die someday,
but the beauty in you shall forever stay."

I haven't talked to mom in a couple of days, when I talked to her last she was getting over a bronchial infection. She mentioned starting back at the gym a few weeks ago. When I talked to her she could hardly breathe from coughing so hard. She was feeling better though.

Denise said...

Your grandmother is smiling down on you sweetie.

Talk..to..Grams said...

I know how you feel!! I loved my Grandma like you do! You wrote such a sweet tribute!! I am a great grandma now and I hope my greats and the grandkids look up to me like you do to your Grandma!! Love and hugs Grams

Deb said...

Bless you! Your not alone my friend, I think a lot of us feel that same way:)
hugs
Deb

Chris said...

Amen Denise!!! How blessed you are to have this wonderful Grandma. And you'll be seeing her again someday!

Mary said...

Denise,

I am glad that you went back and left her those pretty flowers even though she is not there. I'm sure she is smiling down on your from heaven for your lovely gesture.

Like you, my grandmother was my mentor, my friend and my advisor. She loved the Lord and taught me many things about Him and His ways. She also taught me to cook, sew, iron and do so many other things.

One day I said to her, "I will never clean houses for a living." She replied, "Never say never, as that is exactly what you will do."

Many years after she was gone and my first husband was also gone, I did clean houses to support myself and Michelle. So I have always remembered her words. She was so wise and her words are still with me after all these years. I miss her as well and she's been gone since 1974.

Take care, my friend. You teach me so much.

Blessings,
Mary

Anonymous said...

Grandmas are God's gifts to us all to give us hope when we have none. The hope they give is everlasting...just like our Heavenly Father's . We have no trouble remembering their faith in us or the wonderful cookies and treats they gave us when we needed them the most.Memories of them return us to a place of comfort that surrounds us now just as it did then. :-)